Kevin Federline Is A Liar

Kevin Federline’s lawyer(he can afford a non court appointed one? Shocking!)has issued a statement clarifying that yes, there is no Britney/Kevin sex tape:

"There is not a sex video of Kevin and Britney in existence. It goes without saying that the stories of Kevin attempting to sell such a video are patently false and anyone who reports that they have information of such attempts is either lying or reporting the lie of someone else."

That was the last card left in the deck for Kevin to get anything outside the the pre-nuptual agreement that leaves him with $32,000 and in a way I feel sorry for him because the pressure of him impending homelessness caused him to lie. It’s like that time I told everyone in my class my dad was a lion tamer, then they found out the truth when we went on a field trip to the stockyards and everyone saw him gutting a hog while on the federal release program from prison. Only my lie wasn’t played out for all of America to point and laugh at while my pathetic attempt at a rap career couldn’t get off the ground even if it was tied to some helium balloons.