Jessica Simpson Pulls An Ashlee

It’s a pity that Jessica Simpson is such a basket case she couldn’t hold it together at the Kennedy Center Awards where she flubbed her rendition of honoree Dolly Parton’s classic jam "9 to 5" not once, not twice but FIVE TIMES in front of an audience that included President Bush. Denied a teleprompter and settling for some lousy cue cards, Jess’ night was a disaster:

Did she not go through her usual rehearsal of dancing around singing into a hairbrush while stabbing a Nick Lachey voodoo doll with bobby pins?

Simpson looked uncomfortable, blew a lyric and seemed on the verge of tears, as she blurted out at the end of the song, "Dolly, you make me so nervous, I can’t even sing the words right." As Simpson waited backstage to perform, the Washington Post said, the singer was "weeping while the video tribute to Parton played and pacing anxiously during performances by Carrie Underwood, Kenny Rogers, Alison Krauss and Shania Twain. Gauging Parton’s reaction, Reuters said the veteran performer "looked surprised and thrilled" by Rogers and Underwood but "appeared to be significantly less impressed" by Simpson.

I can see why Jessica Simpson was the natural choice when it came to paying homage to fellow blonde bombshell Dolly Parton, they both had their own makeup lines and ginormous hooters that remain the primary focus of interest. Whoever planned this shindig really should have though twice about hiring a Simpson sister to perform live what with Ashlee’s infamous Saturday Night Live Lip Sync scandal. In fact, I think the new term for messing up on stage should "Pulling A Simpson."