Travis Barker: Looking On The Bright Side

Epitome of Media Whoredom was reached today by rock reject Travis Barker as he relished in the attention that catapulted him from D List To C after his ex-wife Shanna Moakler slugged Paris Hilton after the tabs caught the Heiress Barking up the Blink-182 Tree.

Hilton claimed former Miss USA Moakler hit her in the jaw, while Moakler alleged Hilton’s ex-boyfriend, Stavros Niarchos, pushed her down a flight of stairs. Barker says, "I got out of a bad relationship where someone was unfaithful and I went to dinner with someone. I went out to a club with someone. That’s normal for a dude who just gets divorced. I never thought I would be separated from my wife and I’d be with another girl and it’d be all over the tabloids and my wife would be knocking her out. "When all that happened, it was a trip, and to this day I think the paparazzi know that I don’t want any part of it. But I can’t think of better press than a girl beating up another girl over me, so I had to embrace that."

Yeah, nothing says positive press like skanks fighting over you. Could someone explain to me the sex appeal of a punk rock Alfalfa who looks like half his body weight comes from tattoo ink? No fair using Roofies, either.