Lil’ Screech’s Stunt Double

Remember that incredibly gross video that Dustin Diamond aka Screech from Saved By The Bell made? The one where he’s giving a girl a Dirty Sanchez? Now Bayside High’s nerdy alumni member is saying it was an accident that the tape fell into the Sultan Of Sleaze David Hans Schmidt’s hands, but Schmidtty has a different take on the XXX tape:

“Dustin was in on this deal from the start,” Schmidt tells us. “He made this tape in a St. Louis hotel room with two girls last summer with the intention that I would sell it.” Schmidt showed us what he vouches is Diamond’s signature on a contract dated Aug. 27, 2006. Attached is a cover letter on which Diamond’s manager, Roger Paul, appears to have scribbled, “Let’s make some money!” Schmidt suspects Diamond has been doubly deceptive. “I have reason to believe that is not Dustin’s [manhood] in the movie,” says the agent. “You never see his face and his [manhood] in the same shot. If, in fact, he used a body double, I’m going to sue him for defrauding me, Red Light and the American public.”

It’s so awesome when people get all holier than thou over something like a stunt penis. As if Screech’s fake wang is right up there with inaccurate Terror Alerts and misinformation about the war in Iraq. I love what Quentin Tarantino said about SBTB: everyone he knows has seen at least one episode of the show but not one person has ever laughed at it.