Heather Mills Still Crying For Attention

Actually, I’m pretty sure the woman has lost her mind. She’s been encouraging people to drink rat milk, an idea first touted by Simpson’s Mafia Don Fat Tony. I love the Simpsons more than I love oxygen but I don’t go around getting my nutritional practices from the show that features the LardLad and Phineas Q. Butterfat.

Now Heather has ruffled the feathers of Kiwis with her latest campaign to stop Global Warming. Her controversial new billboard featuresthe omnipotent cry of “You Don’t Have A Leg To Stand On”, dissing meat and dairy eaters ascontributing to the problem because livestock are destroying the earth. Hmph. Destroying my waistline with all that tastiness is more like it. New Zealand Agriculture Minister Jim Anderton(smashing name for a bureaucrat, don’t you think?)was outraged at Mills’ claims:

“The woman’s probably off the planet,” Anderton said. “I don’t think she’s got any scientific credibility at all.” “Let the facts get in the way of your ignorance and prejudices. Come and see a dairy farm in New Zealand and see what it looks like compared to what you’re portraying.”

Burn! And what happened to wanting to keep a low profile, for privacy’s sake? I almost felt sorry for her when she was crying about how the press continued to hound her, but that was before she wanted me to drink something that came out of a rodent’s teat. All bets are off when you bring the vision of rat nipples into my consciousness.