Sienna Miller Breaks Up Marriages

Jude Law’s former Orgasm Facilatator Sienna Miller is supposedly responsible for the impending divorce of Sean Penn and Robin Wright Penn:

“Sienna was sitting on Sean’s lap,” according the source. “She was dressed very sexily. She had her arm around his neck.” That night, claims the source, they stayed up quite late.

OK, so you’re telling me he’s leaving Princess Buttercup for someone who leaves the house under the illusion that Control Top Pantyhose make for a suitable pair of pants? If that was your grandma rocking that look, you’d call the nursing home and have her meds upped and shackles tightened.