Heath’s Massuese Called Mary-Kate Olsen Before 911

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Police have revealed that Diane Wolozin the masseuse who found the body of actor Heath Ledger called Mary-Kate Olsen 4 times in nine minutes before she got around to calling the emergency services. 4 times? Like she’s going to pick up even if you did mark the Voicemail “Urgent” with a text message to go with? Even weirder, why on earth didn’t she call 911 FIRST? Mary-Kate Olsen is a lot of things, but last time I checked, she’s not a doctor and I’m pretty sure her limo doesn’t convert into a ambulance so why waste precious moments by ringing her up? Mary-Kate Olsen is who you call if you want to rehash the good old days of Full House when all it took to make America smile was 3 seemingly heterosexual men rasing a houseful of girls in San Francisco. She’d also do in a pinch if you wanted to learn how to stare apathetically at the camera with your mouth pressed into a duck bill or how to live without ever brushing your hair. You find someone passed out unconcious, call 911, not the star of How The West Was Fun!