Katie Holmes Is Off To Summer Camp!

Something tells me there won’t be any s’mores and campfire stories in Mrs. Cruise’s future. Scientology Camp is is probably less about making friendship bracelets and more about auditing the demons that dwell within by drinking lots of oil and sitting in a hot room. Don’t believe me? Google it, bitches.

“It included various tests, confession sessions, tons of reading and physically challenging purification processes,” a Scientology insider reveals. “Tom insists that auditing and purification practices are incredibly beneficial to Scientologists at all levels.” Katie’s intensive Scientology training and treatments have been accelerated in recent weeks, says another source, because she wanted to go to New York City without Tom to star in a Broadway play. But Tom stepped in and put the kibosh on her plans. And now Katie’s been going in for a series of intensive auditing sessions, some which have lasted for 36 hours straight — with little sleep or food.

Look, I know Mad Money was a total bust but is this where she’s at in her life? A few ugly tabloid covers and a wild hair up her ass about a week or two alone in NYC sans husband results in a forced sweat lodge visit accompanied by salad dressing ingredients? Oy.